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Friday, September 4, 2015

Death Threat

First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who left such wonderful comments on my last blog post. You all have kept me going this past week. And I really appreciate it.

Then, this morning, I logged on and found a new comment. Comment #32. Which, besides being nasty, basically sounds like a death threat...

I was going to delete it. But then, I tracked it back through my site meter and I know who the author is---

I won't say her name here, but let me say it's really quite sad.

I left the comment for everyone to view.  I really don't know what this person is talking about  i.e.: "monetary value" I "cheated the State for"? huh?  Bob never got any benefits from the state except share of cost Medicaid, which, by the by, true to form, they want to be reimbursed for every penny now that he's deceased.... and they will be. And Social Security already pulled Bob's last check, as he did not live out the full month of May. (Note to everyone: if you're going die, die on the first of the month!)

So anyway, I left the comment in case anything happens to me, the police will be able to track her down through my computer.

Meanwhile, I went to the grief support group yesterday, which left me so emotionally raw and shaking, that I bolted out the door at the end.  I probably should've stayed and talked to the other two widows there, but there's always next time, I guess.

This is going to be a hard month, as September 16th will be our 21st wedding anniversary.

Trying to take it one day at a time.




18 comments:

Leslie H said...

Good Morning Diane,

I read by feed now, every morning I have the feed open every unread post of the blogs I follow. The first tab it opened to was the comment you are referring to. I was horrified that anyone could be so cruel for any reason. Even more horrified to think that the person was in any way part of the stroke community. I'm still hoping they aren't. Thankfully, as I was deciding whether or not to comment, I moved onto the next open tab, which was this post.

I'm glad you've handled it so well & taken the appropriate steps to protect yourself. I'm sorry you were attacked like that.

Diane said...

Wow, Leslie, that was fast to get a comment! Rest assured, the author is NOT someone from the stroke community.

Anonymous said...

Besides all the things you are going trough you have to deal with sick people (mentally). That person do not have any idea and you don't have to explain yourself to any one.
Just remember there are people who will never know what is to have found true love. Even tough is going to be a sad month just keep the great memories you and Bod had built trough the years and how bless both of you were to have found each other.
Hugs,

Yadira

Anonymous said...

Hi Diane,

Unfortunately, when posting a blog that is public forum, it does on occasion bring out the weirdo's and sicko's such as the one that posted that hurtful comment. And that person is definitely sick in so many ways.

I'm glad you were able to attend the grief counseling and hope you will continue to do so. Yes, it's very difficult to talk about what you are feeling, experiencing, & grieving over, and yes, there will be a lot of tears and deep emotional "trauma's" to deal with, but in the long run it will help you.

Do know, you are always in my thoughts and prayers as well as on my prayer list at church. Sending you lots of hugs.

Dan

Anonymous said...

Wow, Why would someone be so mean.
I have begun to look at life lately with a different point of view.
We were all put on this earth by a creator. We can either coexist or hurt our fellow man.
At one time I hurt Diane. I was drinking. And I regret it.
Today I look back and say to myself, Life is too short.
Ask forgiveness.
Try to do better. And go on.
The person who wrote the nasty post must be a tortured individual.
They are wrong, but Diane needs to do as she said report it.

Patricia

KanDav said...

I'm shocked, and saddened that in addition to everything else going on in your life, now you have to deal with a hurtful, untrue, and concerning comment. Good deal that you've handled it so well, and please do take care of yourself. In this world of anonymity, it's a shame things have to be where we all have to be so "on guard", but you can't be too careful. I hope it was a one time "troll" comment.

Happy to hear you went to the support group. Sometimes the hardest part is just getting ready and going out the door. Especially when I would rather stay in my comfy clothes and not go anywhere. But I can say, 9 out of 10 times, I'm usually happy I didn't stay home. The 10th time is when I realize I was better off in my jammies at home...lol
Prayers for you as you continue to navigate forward.
Regards,
Kan

Jenn said...

"Do unto others as you would have done to you.". A familiar sentiment.
In yogic practice this is called ahimsa.
"Ahimsa - Compassion for all living things.
The word ahimsa literally mean not to injure or show cruelty to any creature or any person in any way whatsoever. Ahimsa is, however, more than just lack of violence as adapted in yoga. It means kindness, friendliness, and thoughtful consideration of other people and things. It also has to do with our duties and responsibilities too. Ahimsa implies that in every situation we should adopt a considerate attitude and do no harm."

I send peace and healing to Diane. I also send peace and healing to the Anonymous comment #32 writer on Diane's previous blog. Om shanti.

Jenn said...

The above quote is from
http://www.expressionsofspirit.com/yoga/eight-limbs.htm

DebbieL said...

Diane, so sorry you had do deal with this mean-spirited person. Sending you peace and love!

PJK :o) said...

Diane, I've commented once or twice before on your blog & this time, I just want to say - try to forget this vile person & their comment. They clearly have no idea of grief, of personal expression or of sympathy. People like that are just what I call *Instant Experts*. They have an opinion on everything, even things they have no idea about. I expect this person will even profess to know more about Bob's medical condition than his doctors & you did. Instant Expert - just add water :o)

It's easy to say try & forget about the comment but for your own emotional well being, you really need to. You're in a very fragile state at the moment & brooding on things like this won't help. I know you know this already, but please do not let this awful person add to your grief.

If you don't mind, I'd like to think of you & Bob on 16 September. It's going to be a hard day for me too, as it would have been my Mum's birthday & she died on 30 June. Not the same as losing a husband, I know, but it's hard to lose your Mum.

Grief is a personal thing, there's no right way & no wrong way. Take each day as it comes, try to remember the good times & try, even more, to think of those who love & care for you, not the one crank who feels it their duty or their place, to spout such vile nonsense.

(((Hugs))) ♥

Lisa said...

I am horrified that someone would have the nerve to post something so mean. This person should be ashamed of themselves for trying to be so cruel to someone who is pouring their heart out. I often wonder what has happened to people who enjoys posting these types of comments.

Anonymous said...

Hi Diane

Been trying to reach you. Sorry to hear about Bob . I was shocked to find out.... a month or so after he died. Not making this long in case you don't receive. Send home addy

Kathy S Madison

Anonymous said...

Hi Diane

I can be on your support team . Please get a facebook account and you can still keep the blog (which I would try to publish)

Kathy S

Diane said...

Kathy, you can reach me by email --it hasn't changed or through my profile page on this blog. I tried to email you -did you get it?

J.L. Murphey said...

Diane,
There are some sick puppies out there. They think they can comment and not be found out...how untrue. You can block this person.

Denise said...

So sorry it's so rough for you. I appreciate your blog and wish I could help, but all I can do is offer sympathy.

Barb Polan said...

Diane, You probably know, but haters are impotent bullies, pointing out their own flaws in someone else. So, since you know who the person is, let me describe her (stab in the dark based on how important love is to the bully): someone who has never loved/been loved, someone who cheats - maybe collects disability without qualifying, a taker rather than a giver. I'd also venture a guess that it's someone who knows both you and Bob offline, criticized you for not putting him a nursing home, and never came to visit or offer any support after the stroke. Am I close? (That's a rhetorical question, but it would be interesting to know.)

Diane said...

Barb -- LOL -- you're very very close!

And, thanks for the beautiful card!