Signs

So, on September 16th, our wedding anniversary, I had originally planned to attend a birthday party for my friend Hillary (whose birthday is Sept. 16th) and thought had myself "covered" with a plan for the day.  Then two days before the 16th, I get a call and Hillary's party is cancelled.  Shoot.

So that led me scrambling to make a new plan and I called two of my grief support group friends, fellow widows Linda and Candy who both said they would "be there for me" -- thank god! And also told me we could do "anything" I wanted to do that day.

Well, you know I broke the Buddha statue that I had purchased as memorial for Bob while preparing for Hurricane Irma. I broke it while taking into the garage for "safe keeping" but weirdly, as I was carrying the heavy concrete statue I turned the corner and saw the automatic garage door going down -- which was odd to say the least. So I had to set the Buddha on the ground, click the button to open the garage, and as I picked up the Buddha I panicked worrying the door might come back down on me, so sort of sprinted into the garage (too fast) tripped and fell.  I didn't hurt myself. Buddha broke my fall. But the statue was smashed into a million pieces..... aargh

So I told my friends I wanted to go out and find another Buddha.

On the morning of Sept. 16th, I woke up early (or was it just a dream) but I woke up because I felt pressure around my shoulders and waist. I was lying on my side and looked down and saw (I swear) Bob's arms (complete with his watch) hugging me from behind and I heard him whisper in my ear, "Happy Anniversary, Sweets." I turned, so I could see his face, but he was gone. Disappeared. I sat up in bed. The clock read 6:00 a.m., the radio was on, the dog curled up at the bottom of the bed, and thought "am I dreaming this?" or "did this really happen?" but if it was just a dream, I certainly wanted to go back to it, so I closed my eyes and fell into a deep sleep not waking until 9:00 a.m.

Then when I went into the living room, where I have Bob's ashes and also his photo with his watch draped over the side, the photo was lying flat down, face up... and I could see no way that just this photo was disturbed and nothing on the table. Odd that.

Well, we went on the Buddha hunt and went to the place I bought the original Buddha -- but he had every single imaginable Buddha except, of course, the one I wanted which he had just sold that  morning at 8:30 a.m.  But the shop owner told me he could order me one and wrote down all the info he would need to order it on a business card, because I had told him that I had seen another Buddha at an antique mall and was going to check there first to see if it was still available.

So off we go the to antique mall, which is one of those huge antique malls, with winding aisles and little rooms to the sides and very easy to get lost in. No luck on the Buddha, but Candy had seen a couple tables she might be interested in for her new condo, so I was keeping my eye out for not only a Buddha but a small table and then I lost the girls -- and when I found them, they were talking with another customer, a man, who asking them questions that neither Candy or Linda could answer (not being antique collectors themselves) but me -- this is my field of expertise, so I asked him what he needed and basically he wanted to know if prices were "fixed" or you can make offer and I explained how antique malls work and being a former dealer myself, explained it would depend on some factors (like how long the dealer had the item, how much money that person made that month, etc. but also most dealers mark the prices a bit higher than they really want just to have some "haggling room"). I also explained he needed to get the Dealer code off the price tag as each little room, little area, was rented by a different dealer and he could take that info to the main desk and they could call the dealer from there to see if his offer was acceptable or not or countered.

Anyway, the customer then said he wasn't even sure if the piece was worth what he thought of offering and I said, "show me, I know thing or two about antiques" so I followed him to a drop front desk with a cabinet on top of it, but the bottom half had a different finish than the top so it looked like either someone stuck two pieces together that didn't originally go together -- that or someone started refinishing the piece and stopped for some reason.  Told him I wouldn't buy it and he said he had another in mind and I followed him the next piece, similar to the first one, drop front desk with a cabinet but this was a reproduction. So I asked him if he wanted a real "antique" or not, because it was nice piece furniture and the price wasn't bad, but it was a reproduction. He explained that his wife loved antiques, he didn't care that much, but didn't want to disappoint her and then asked me how I knew it was a repro -- so I started opening doors, pointing out modern screws, pulled out drawers and pointed out particle board bottoms, etc.

So he had another yet in mind, and as I was following him to the next desk I passed a locked glass display cabinet in which were, among other things, two antique telephones from the 1920's, you know the heavy black desk phones, one of which looked a lot like the one Bob & I had and when I passed that display case, I swear I'm not making this up, one of the phones rang. And I stopped dead in my tracks.

My first thought was "that's an odd place to have a phone hooked up" -- then "maybe I just heard an echo from the front desk", or "maybe someone has a cell phone with an old fashion ring tone" (you know the ding-a-ling) and looked around but no one was near me. Then the phone rang again. The sound definitely coming from the display case. I looked closer and could see the wires for the  phones were not hooked to anything. And, then, a pause, and it rang a third time, while I stood there dumbfounded. And then it stopped when the guy I was following came back to find me -- and I asked him if he had a heard a phone ring and he shook his head and looked at me like I was crazy. ha! But I'm not crazy, I heard that phone and that was Bob calling -- I only wish the cabinet hadn't been locked because I would have picked up the phone and answered it. But definitely, Bob was giving me a thumbs up from above, because you know antique shopping was something we would have done on our wedding anniversary....

Anyway, long story short (though this is quite a long post already), the customer showed me the last desk which was the real deal, ca 1900-1915, mission style quarter sawn oak, beautiful piece and I thought a good price esp. since that dealer was having a 30% off sale.  But he was worried it might be "too small" for the space in his house so I gave him directions to a couple of antique malls that he might check out.

You know, I felt pretty proud of myself after that experience, because normally I would not have struck up a conversation with a total stranger and then proceed to follow him around sharing my antique knowledge....  I felt like myself again.  Something I haven't felt like in a long time since Bob died....

So after stopping at a few more stores, not finding a Buddha, but having good friends with me and having a nice dinner afterwards, it turned out to be a good day all around.  (And I ordered the Buddha -- should be here in a few weeks....)