Ghost of Christmas Past

My Big Sis, Karen & Me
1961

In the Victorian times and well before, Christmas was a time for sharing ghost stories and also for remembering the dead by setting "the empty chair" at the holiday table.

So it shouldn't surprise me that my sister paid a visit to my spiritualist church... but it did.

The service had gone as usual, I only got one "reading" from a medium who told me he couldn't see anything around me except "a huge white cloud of love" and it was coming from "your sidekick" (Kona) who loves me so unconditionally that the energy of that love was blocking any other energy around me. Either that, or it was because I had treats in purse, ha!

But at the end of the service, Reverend Bev, the church leader, who rarely gives readings at Sunday service, stepped up to the podium and announced that she was being "bothered by impressions" and needed to share them. First, she asked, if anyone had a loved one on the other side who had a second name of "Blue" and she thought this was someone's pet. I immediately thought of Jonah Blue, the dog I had when I was 19 years old, my first dog, but before I could raise my hand, someone else did -- claiming they had a niece with "Blue" as a middle name but she was not deceased and Reverend Bev seemed a bit confused by this. So she quickly changed subjects and told us that she had been hearing the name "Karen". And was anyone here named Karen? Or had a loved one on the other side named Karen? As she couldn't tell if there was a spirit wanting to speak to Karen or a spirit telling her their name was Karen. No one raised their hand. So I raised mine.

Reverend Bev said, "Oh! Is your name Karen?"

Which I answered that my sister's name was Karen and she was indeed on the other side.

Reverend Bev concentrated a moment and began to deliver a message from Karen, it went like this:

"Your sister was fair-haired? And not long passed?" (correct)

"She says you had a rocky relationship," Reverend Bev makes a wavy motion in the air, "There were times when you were quite close but others when you were very distant." (correct again) "And she wants to apologize for those 'voids' when you weren't close..."

"Now, she's showing me white little... things that look like...flowers? They look like fluffy white flowers. Little fluffy white flowers falling from the sky. Did your sister like white flowers?" (I had no clue.) "Were there white flowers at her funeral?" (Again, no clue.) "Well she's showing me these white fluffy little things that look like flowers and they are falling from the sky and she's reaching out to catch them, these white fluffy sort of sparkling flowers. And she says she wants to give them to you to fill those voids when you were apart as these flowers represent happiness to her. And she wishes you happiness."

Oh-kay. None of this makes sense, except the fact that we did have an extremely rocky relationship... and there were certainly those times when we didn't even talk to each other... sometimes for years.

Reverend Bev goes on, "Now she's constricting my throat and my chest, I can hardly breathe. Usually this is a sign that the person died suddenly of a heart attack or not being able to breathe. And died quite unexpectedly. Is that correct?" (Correct.)

"And I will leave you with that, except she wants you to know she loves you. And she's okay with the way she passed."

So I go home confused about these white fluffy flower things and what they meant. Later that day, I spoke with my parents on the phone (both of them total skeptics) and told them Karen showed up in church.

My mom said, "Who?"

"Karen, your daughter. My sister."

"What do you mean showed up?"

"Well..." And I told them what I just told you and when I was done my mother gasped. 

She said, "My goodness, I have a photo of your sister just like what you described. But it's milkweed pods. Do you know the picture I'm talking about? The white fluffy milkweed pods falling from the sky?"

I had no clue what picture my mother was talking about. My mom said she had taken the picture home with her after my sister's funeral, it was one that my nephew had brought to set at the altar. My mother liked the photo because to her it represented "freedom", feeling free and happy. Also, there were white daisies on the altar which were my sister's favorite flower. All this was news to me (I wasn't there, I broken my hand and was stuck at home, and honestly, didn't know my sister liked daisies...). My mom couldn't believe that Reverend Bev had been so right about everything and then she had my niece e-mail me a copy of the photo. Here it is: